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VOL. XXVII. AUBURN, ALABAMA, FRID AY, OCTOBER 26, 1923. No. 7
TIGERS GIVE ARMY
MULE GREAT BATTLE
Team and Party Have
Great Trip on Second
Northern Invasion
\
•
By R. L. Simpson.
Again the Auburn Tiger ventured
forth into the stable of the
Army Mule and as was the case before,
the Tiger found the hide of
the mule too tough to digest, but
the mule, in the form of Smythe,
had to exert a mighty kick in order
to free himself from the Tiger's
claw.
All will agree, those that saw the
game, that the old adage, "Sometimes
there is victory in defeat,"
applies to the Auburn team when
it met and was beaten by the powerful
West Point eleven. Auburn
went into the fray weighing eighteen
pounds less per man than the
Army team and besides this difference
was greatly exceeded in
amount of experience that the veteran
gray team held over the Orange
and Blue. Garbisch, Smythe,
Mulligan, Farwick and Wood were
chosen by many scribes as Ail-
American material, while Tiny
Hewett, old Pittsburgh star, was
also among this list. This is no
abili, as Auburn teams don't need
them, but it is just to show what
'—-brand of looibaii they were forced
to play to make the showing they
displayed.
At three o'clock, with the Cadets
in the west stands urging the Soldiers
on and a group of Auburn
supporters, three thousand strong,
in the east stands cheering the
Tigers, the Army kicked to Auburn.
After making three first downs,
Greene was forced to punt. The
f Army marched thirty yards up the
field before the Plainsmen got
their toe-hold, and when it became
necessary for the Cadets to punt,
the kick was blocked and Brice
fell upon it. Dean Peterson directed
a few plays into the line and
mixed it with an air attack, which
combination netted the Tigers forty
yards and a touchdown. A long
pass, Harrison to Pruitt, was complete
and old "Hard Boy" stepped
over the last chalk line for a
counter.
After the excitement subsided
and play resumed, it was evident
that the Cadets knew what they
were up against and as a result increased
the brand of fight accordingly.
Auburn's line worked heroically
to stop the powerful charges
of the backs who would not be
denied, but their sheer strength
battered the lighter team for big
gains.
It was unfortunate a few decisions
of the officials marred what
would have otherwise been an extremely
clean game, from every
point of view. One decision in
particular was against Auburn
when the referee claimed that an
Auburn back had interfered with a
forward pass that hit the uprights
and as a result the ball was given
to the Cadets on the two-foot line,
from where it was easily carried
over by them, giving them their
first touchdown.
All credit possible should be given
to the fleet-footed Smythe, who
thrilled the stands with two beautiful
runs almost the distance of
the field for touchdowns. In each
case fine interference aided him,
but these sprints were among the
(Continued on Page 4)
"Hard Boy" Pruitt, Auburn's fighting
flanksman, who made the
touchdown against the Army.
STUDENTS ORRANIZE
SPANISH CLUB
Under the capable direction of
Professor Roe of the Modern Language
Department, the students who
are deeply interested in the study
and use of Spanish as a spoken
language have organized a Spanish
Club for carrying out their purposes.
The purpose and aim of this organization
will be to put into practical
use the Spanish which the students
are learning here by actual
conversations in the language. At
the meetings of the club nothing
will be allowed to be spoken except
Spanish. This is the only
means of really learning the language
where it will be of real practical
value to anyone. There are a
number of students in Auburn who
have lived in or visited in Spain
or Spanish-speaking countries, and
have learned to converse excellently
in the language. These will form
the nucleus about which the club
will be built up. Professor Roe
will be leader and director, and as
he has had former experience in
similar organizations, it is expected
that this club will be a decided
success.
To everyone who is able to speak
and understand Spanish, if only to
a limited extent, a cordial invitation
is extended to become a member
of the club. One cannot fail
to profit by it. The organization of
the club has not been completed
yet, but will be within the next
few days. If you are interested
and wish to join, either see Professor
Roe in person at his office
in the Library or drop him a card.
It is the purpose of this Club to
afford amusement and fun as well
as instruction at its weekly meetings.
It will be well worth'your
time, so do not fatl to take advantage
of such an opportunity.
The more you do, the more you
are given to do.
MODERN LANGUAGES
BECOMING POPULAR
Spanish and German Double
In Enrollment
Nothing of importance is ever
done without a plan.
The study of modern languages,
including German, at Auburn has
received a boost which shows an
increased enrollment in the department
of nearly one hundred
over last year.
The number of French students
has risen from 114 to .135. There
are 108 students studying Spanish
as compared with 54 of last year,
and 21 in German as compared
with only 9 last year.
Prof. G. C. L. Schuchard, graduate
of a famous institution in Germany
as well as Columbia University,
New York, from which he
holds an M. A. degree, has arrived
here to take up his work as acting
head of the department. Prof.
Schuchard has a diploma, "Testimonium
Maturitatis," from an institution
founded in the year 775
at Hersfeld, Germany. He has also
studied at Berlin University and
Jena University. He is a native of
Illinois and has taught Modern
Languages in leading schools in
New York and New Jersey. He is
now writing his doctor's thesis on
Verse Metre.
Prof. Schuchard is assisted by
Prof. J. W. Roe, who holds a master's
degree from Cornell University.
Prof. Roe received his secondary
education in London Collegiate
Institute, Geneva, €J*«itzer-land,
and Hanover, Genuaffy. He
has taught in New Jersey and for
the past four years* at Syracuse
University, N. Y.( He is an ex-service
man, having enlisted in the
Field Artillery serving in France
sixteen months with Battery B
Field Artillery, 2nd Division.
COACH P i n s MAKES
DONATION TO MUSEUM
Trophies of Summer Outing
Contributed
NEW UNIFORMS ARRIVE
At last Auburn has got some decent
looking uniforms, in fact they
are more than decent looking, they
are the keenest uniforms that can
be bought. For the last three or
four years, the students, especially
the Juniors and Seniors, have been
fussing about the same old regular
0. D. uniforms and have been trying
to get uniforms befitting a distinguished
military college like Auburn.
Each Junior and Senior received
a package which contained a full
tailored uniform with a Norfolk
cut coat and leather putts and. all
the other fixings that go with the
outfit. It is impossible to describe
such a uniform and do it justice,
and you can judge them for yourself
when you see all these military
geniuses strutting forth looking
like West Point Cadets.
The new uniforms will be a big
asset to Auburn in more ways than
one. They lend dignity to the officers
and help the Military Department
as a whole. When all the
Sophomores and Freshmen see
what kind of uniform they are to
wear when they become Juniors
and Seniors, a larger percentage
of them will want to take the advanced
course. Another advantage
is that the uniforms are guaranteed
to fit and if they don't fit, then the
company who made them will
make provisions for them to be altered
without cost to the students.
When one finishes the advanced
training the uniform belongs to
him and ho can do as he likes with
it.
The Museum of the Department
of Entomology and Zoology of the
Agricultural College here has just
received from J. E. Pitts, Coach of
Football, a beautifully mounted
specimen of "Monkey faced"* owl
and a sixty-five pound specimen of
Tarpon caught by him on a fishing
trip to Pass-A-Grill, Florida, last
summer.
In announcing receipt of these
appreciated gifts Prof. J. M. Robinson
stated that the "Monkey Faced"
owl will he placed with the other
birds in the Avean cabinets and
that the Tarpon will be given a
permanent place on the walls of
Comer Agricultural Hall. The Tarpon
is commonly known as the Silver
King and is regarded as the
greatest game fish. It appears along
the Atlantic Coast from Long Island
to Brazil, being more abundant
in southern waters. Its breeding
quarters are thought to be near
Porto Rico.
This gift by Coach Pitts is the
second big addition to the Natural
History Museum this year. Ex-Governor
Comer presented to the college
last spring the head of a moose
and the head of a caribou which
he killed on one of his hunting
trips in Canada.
In expressing bis appreciation
Prof. Robinson said: "We are
very grateful indeed for such well-mounted
natural history specimens
and are in position to accomodate
others who wish to add to
our collection. We are endeavoring
to collect a complete set of Alabama's
fish and game, including all
the common wild animals.
RATS ELECT OFFICERS
Freshman "rats" under the supervision
of the president of the
senior class have organized. The
organization was perfected at a
rousing meeting in the Engineering
auditorium. More than four
hundred freshmen were on hand
and the election had all the ear
marks of a hot political campaign.
In the final run off, William
Patrick Moulton of Mobile, was
elected President, Connie Holt
King of Dothan, vice-president,
James Peyton Atherton of Montgomery,
secretary, Margaret Lane
of Auburn, treasurer, and Murray
Hoffman of Waverly, historian.
The "rats" elected to serve on
committees were as follows: Social
Committee, Ellis Bryan Anderson
of Memphis; Tenn.; Cooperative
Committee, Paul Sanders Turner
of Anniston; Student Government,
John Robert Gregg of Montgomery
and Maxwell Earl Jones of
Dothan.
In keeping with traditions here
the president of the senior class,
George W. Phillips, had general
charge of the meeting.
These "rat" officers make up a
group of cooperative workers that
will give the "rats" the right to
claim the honor of being the best
first year class that has even .been
seen or heard of in Auburn. The
spirit that has thus far been displayed
shows that this class is
destined to excel that of all others
in that line.
"Minnie" Brice, who played a great
game at tackle. His falling on
an Army punt, which was blocked
in midfield, aided the Tigers
materially.
GEORGIA FRESHMEN
SWAMP JUNIOR TIGERS
INGALLS SPEAKS
TO STUDENTS AT
CONVOCATION
President Birmingham
iJChamber* of Commerce
| Makes Interesting
Address
Auburn Rats Fumble Away
Game, While Morton of
Georgia Runs Wild
An efficient boss attracts efficient
workmen.
One of the features of the final
day of the Opelika Fair was the
game between the Georgia and
Auburn Freshmen. The teams
seemed to be pretty well matched
in weight and size, but the local
Rats appeared to have stage fright
or something). Inability to hold
the ball seemed to be their main
trouble, there being several costly
fumbles,1 while on the other hand
the Georgia backs clung tightly to
the pigskin and were given great
support by their line.
The Georgia system of play was
apparently very simple. Captain
Morton, the soft-spoken quarterback,
would advance the ball up
to the goal line, and then one of
his playmates would carry it
across. Auburn's backs did some
fine line plunging but their fumbles
would lose all that they had gained.
Haygood and Turner were especially
good on the offense, while
Andress hit the line with telling
effect.
In the first quarter, after Georgia
had failed to make any appreciable
gain, she punted to the little Tigers'
5 yard line. Auburn fumbled,
and the Crackers recovered. On
the second play, Sherlock scored,
Hollis adding the extra point. In
the second quarter this procedure
was repeated.
The Greenbacks went into the
third period with blood in their
eyes and murder in their hearts,
but the mild-voiced Mr. Morton advanced
the ball up to the shadows
of the goal posts, and Fullback
Kain did the honors. This seemed
to be a big enough margin, but the
heartless Georgians would not relent,
and in the fourth quarter,
Brer Morton recovered a fumble
and made a pretty 35 yard run for
another counter. Their lust still
unsatisfied, Kain carried it over
again, making a grand total of 33
points. At this juncture Coach
(Continued on Page 4)
Robert T. Ingalls, president of
the Ingalls Iron Works and also
president of the Chamber of Commerce
of Birmingham, in an address
here before Auburn upj>er
classmen, declared that the country
is becoming tax mad, that money
is being piled up in taxes for
political disbursement rather than
for the things that should be done
including necessary expenditures
/or public education. Fully seven
hundred students and faculty members
were present. Dr. B. B. Ross
presented Mr. Ingalls as an oat-standing
business man and civic
leader.
The speaker also touched on
the Muscle Shoals controversy
and urged his hearers to carefully
peruse both the bid of Mr. Ford as
well as the bid of the Alabama
Power Co.
"I wonder how many of yon have
read the Ford bid for Muscle
Shoals, also that of the Alabama
Power Company?" asked Mr. Ingalls.
"I will not discuss the merits
or demerits of either, but as
some of our would-be-statesmen
are attempting to make this issue
a political football, I would recommend
for your consideration a
careful perusal of these bids, both
to be approached with an open
mind. '
"This country is becoming tax
mad. The unscrupulous, ignorant
and unthinking, all of whom have
the same voice at the poll as the
thinking and conservative, may
and often do elect to office that
type of law maker who tries to tax
and legislate against one interest
(Continued on Page 4)
TIGERS READY FOR
BATTLE WITH BENNING
Team in Good Condition.
Soldiers Also have
Fast Team
Since the return of the Tiger
cohorts to the Village, the team has
lost no time in making preparations
for the coming games, Tuesday
afternoon found the entire
squad on Drake field hard at work
and the thrill of the. long trip to
the Hudson a past issue. The Tigers
realize full well the fight they
will get in the following five
games on their schedule, and they
have lost no time in getting down
to business. The first of the series
of tough battles is slated for tomorrow
on the Plainsmen's campus
when the Pitts' machine will
tackle the fast Camp Benning
eleven.
This game for the past four
years has been a tough game on
the Tigers' program and it has always
been a hotly contested and
thrilling game. This year the predictions
are that the struggle will
be more fierce tban in the previous
encounters, due to the fact
that the soldiers are determined to
get revenge for the defeats admin-
(Continued on Page 4)
THE PLAINSMAN
(Efy $kinsman
OFFICIAL WEEKLY STUDENT PUBLICATION OF THE
ALABAMA POLYTECHNIC INSTITUTE
FORMERLY "ORANGE AND BLUE"
EXCHANGES
EDITORIAL STAFF
Irving Patrick - Editor-in-Chief
O. S. Hagerman --- Managing Editor
B. H.*Swango Associate Editor
B.E.Lambert Associate Editor
J W. Bates Associate Editor
J. G. Stockleberg - Associate Editor
MaryApperson . . ---- Associate Editor
Chloe Earnest Associate Editor
\V. T. Wood - --.--' Sports Editor
Milton Collins ~ Exchange Editor
BUSINESS STAFF
Fred Almgren Business Manager
F K. Stockleberg Assistant Business Manager
C S. Smith Advertising Manager
R. A. Allen --- Circulation Manager
D. M. Chambers Assistant Circulation Manager
Entered as second-class 'matter at Post Office, Auburn, Ala.
The Old Time Spirit
Is Here
GangI doesn't that sound good?
Ain't it a grand and glorious feeling
to think that the Auburn Spirit
is once more back to its true form
—that it's getting so strong that it
just can't be kept down—that it is
going to stay behind that team until
the last whistle blows on Grant
Field on Turkey Day?
No doubt, there are those who
only a couple of weeks ago seemed
to be downhearted over the fact
that the spirit here was not what
it should be. Now they and all
the rest are rejoicing over the fact
that the Auburn Spirit is very much
alive and that while it is now so
strong that the town can hardly
hold it, it is still growing and soon
the old team is going to have to
invade new territory and conquer
new lands to put it on. And everything
seems to show that that is
exactly what the old gang is going
to do. The first new territory to
be" invaded will be "Georgia." Then
"Tulane/' "Centre," and "Tech"
must follow in order. Whether
they will be conquered or not depends
largely upon whether or not
this spirit which how seems so
rampant is going to keep up^
The old time spirit is here!
Here's hoping that it is here to
stay! "Charlie" has been back
with the gang and such another
revival of spirit was never seen
before. At that mass meeting on
last Tuesday night, he gave the
bunch a confidential talk--out on
the bleachers he got things started
right--until today everybody is
overflowing with the same kind of
spirit that used to be here, .that
used to lead Auburn on to Southern
Championships. Gee! but it is a
glorious sight to see everyone
"pepped up" with the determination
to stay behind that team while
it fights with everything that it has
got, and to back it up to the last
ditch. If there is anyone who
hasn't got the spirit, let him get it
now, and if he doesn't want to get
it, then Auburn is no place for
him.
Interest Being Taken in
Student Government
' It is very gratifying to all who
are interested in the welfare and
future progress of Auburn to note
that great interest has been taken
in the question of Student Govern
ment in this institution. The various
classes have elected committees
to draw up a Constitution and
by-laws to be presented to the
student body for ratification at a
later date. When an editorial on
this subject was published in "THE
PLAINSMAN" two weeks ago, advocating
a consideration of the
possibility of having Student Government
in Auburn, it was not expected
that such immediate action
would be taken upon it by the
classes here. But this action is
very auspicious and promising and
if it goes through, a new phase
will be added to the numerous
things which go to make Auburn
a successful and popular institu-tion.
There may be those who will
say that it is impossible to carry
out such a plan here.-that Student
Government in Auburn is a virtual
impossibility. No doubt they
will mention the fact that such a
plan was attempted here two years
ago in which the Constitution and
by-laws were voted down by the
students on account of certain unfavorable
clauses. That is all very
well. They have a perfect right
to their opinion and those opinions
are and must be respected. But
let them not be too skeptical. Let
them remember that whenever Auburn
attempts anything that is
worth while, they always put it
over, and that Student Government
is not only a possibility here but
that it now appears to be a probability.
The action which the different
classes have taken in electing
these committees for drawing
up the basis of the" government
seems to indicate that the vast
majority of students here are in
favor of this project and are attempting
to put it over.
Student Government, if put into
operation in this institution, will
put Auburn in line with the vari
ous other colleges and universities
throughout the country which have
adopted it. What has proved to
be successful elsewhere will no
doubt prove successful here. But,
you may say, there may be dissatisfaction
with the Constitution and
by-laws as there was before. This
possibility is plainly seen, but let
this be remembered, that every
clause in that Constitution and every
by-law, that this committee
draws up and submits to the administrative
branch of #the institution
for their consideration, is going
to be just as expedient and
just as advantageous to all parties
concerned as it is possible to make
them. But if a "hitch" should
come, do not allow the whole project
to be thrown to the winds.
Just remember this, that here must
be a beginning somewhere, and
that any form of Student Government
may prove better than none
at all.
The Exchange Editor notes with
interest the announcement in "The
Reflector" of Mississippi A. & M.
of a very interesting Lyceum program
consisting of nine numbers
scattered throughout the year. Mississippi
A. & M. is at Starksville,
Miss., which is about twice as large
as Auburn perhaps. If Mississippi
A. & M. can have standard lyceum
attractions, why can't Auburn have
the same? Many students have expressed
a desire for more and varied
amusement that the college picture
show. Talk up a Lyceum
course and maybe we'll have one.-
next year.
DOES IT PAY TO BE A COLLEGE
GRADUATE
Less than one per cent of American
men are college graduates, yet
this one per cent has furnished:
55 per cent of our presidents.
36 per cent of the members of
congress.
47 per cent of the speakers of
the house. •
62 per cent of the secretaries of
state.
54 per cent of the vice-presidents.
50 per cent of the secretaries of
the treasury.
67 per cent of the attorney generals.
69 per cent of the justices of the
supreme court.
50 per cent of the men composing
the constitutional conventions.
Does it pay to be a College Graduate?
IT CAN'T BE DONE
I want to be naughty,
I want to be nice,
I want all the fun without the
price,
I want all the thrills of a soul kiss;
1 want all the things that good girls
miss.
I want the arms and heart of a
man,
And yet stay single if I can.
Won't someone please give me
some advice,
How I can be naughty and still be
nice?
—Ole Miss.
"A CHAPEL TALK"
"Among the things that really
count in this life are"—"the adding
machine" finished the Freshman.
—Emory Wheel.
"It is almost hopeless for the
automobilists to try to destroy all
the locomotives at the railroad
crossings. The Baldwin works
alone are turning out a locomotive
an hour."
—Minneapolis'-.Journal.
officers that is.piloting the organization
this year consists of the following:
President F. A. Clarke, Andalusia;
Vice-President G. C. Wald-ing.
Midland City; Secretary Burke
Sylvest, Clifton, La.; Treasurer P.
D. Nicaise, Bay St. Louis, Miss.;
Critic E. H. Durr, Brookhaven,
Miss.
ON WITH THE DANCE
Did you see all those fellows
Who met that two-twenty train?
They were aU jellied up
Like it was Sunday again.
And say, did you notice
AH"those girls they met?
They sure were keen babies.
That, I'll be willing to bet.
And to think that all those damsels
With those tooth, that eye, them
hair,
Are. down to the Opening Dances
With a lotta hot clothes to wear.
They'll strut more keen stuff
Than you've seen in all your
lives,
And just to look at them, you'd
think
They were old King Solomon's
wives.
So tell them things they love to
hear,
Why they're so sweet and fine;
But don't expect them to believe it
For they know this Auburn line.
.."Bevo."
F.D.Lee Taylor
JEWELER
Auburn, Alabama
A POEM IN ONE PIECE .
They got a quart,
Went oh a spree,
Another Ford
Wrapped round a tree.
A rag, a bone, a hank of hair,
A lipstick, rouge, - and a baby
stare,
Talk in terms of cash and kiss,
Lo, behold: the modern Miss.
—Amherst, Lord Jeff.
"Say, Wise," said. Soapy Phillips
at the Co-op after waiting 15 minutes
for a hot kitty, "Have: you
ever been to a Zoo?"
"No," replied Wise.
"Well, you ought to go. you'd enjoy
watching the turtles whiz past
you."
THE LATEST PROPOSAL
Half in earnest, half in joke,
Tell me, maiden, e're I'm broke,
Buying food and drink for thee,
Tell, oh, tell the truth to me,
E're my cash is all turned loose,
Sweetheart, is there any use?
—Ole Miss.
V. M. A. Sets Pace
At a recent meeting of the Auburn
Veterinary Medical Associar
tion, composed of students of the
Veterinary College, a record was
disclosed that easily makes the association
one of the leading student
organizations. According to
the report, during the session of
'22-'23 every student in the Veterinary
College was a member of the
Association and each one had an
individual average attendance of 89
per cent for the entire year. Meetings
are held once weekly in the
main Veterinary Building.
The wprk for the new year has
been renewed with even more zeal
and determination than that of
last year. Several meetings have
already been held. Undertakings
of greater magnitude are already
under consideration. The corps of
Burton's Book Store
Forty-five Years Old and
* i £& Still Growing
COLLEGE AND SCHOOL TEXT
• BOOKS
Complete Line of Drawing Instruments
and materials
L. & M. BURTON, Proprietors
J. A. GREENE
Bradley Sweaters
Orange and Blue
J. G. BEASLEY
COAL and WOOD
AUBURN ALABAMA
The
Goodform Shop
12 Dexter Ave.
Montgomery, A1&.
The Young Man's Store
COPELAND & EARNEST
STAPLE AND
FANCY GROCERIES
—FEEDS—
Phone 125 Auburn, Ala.
Auburn Students!
We Welcome You!
Our Service for
Auburn Men
at all times
MITCHELLS
BARBER SHOP
AUBURN ALABAMA
Robertson's Quick Luuch
OPEN DAY AND NIGHT
The Best That Can Be Bought
Served As Well As Can Be Served
15 Commerce Sr., Montgomery, Ala
Particular People Pick
THE
PICKWICK
THE PROPER PLACE TO DINE
Montgomery, Alabama
• — »
FOR-FELT
GOODS
SEE
BOWLING & MYERS
Prof. Hare's Cottage
. — - »
W . D . G I B S ON
AUBURN'S LARGEST HABERDASHERY
Our Bradiey Sweaters are better than
ever this season. Interwoven Sox,
Bostonian Shoes
College Souvenirs
Phone 190 Auburn, Ala
GET A DRIVE-IT-YOURSELF
MEADOWS GARAGE
AUTO REPAIRS, TIRES AND TUBES J
S. L. TOOMER
Druggist
Store On The Corner
«—*-
TEA
Regular Board
2 Meals $16
, - . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .
ROOM j
Special Parties
3 Meals $22.50 j
PAUL KING
Fancy and Staple Groceries
Phone 24
A. Z. CARTER
CLEANING
PRESSING
ALTERING
T A X I
Phone 90
REPAIRING
Auburn, Ala.
J. W. Wright, Jr.
Complete Line of Furnishings.,
for Auburn Students
NE*XT TO THE POSTOFF1CE
AUBURN>ALABAMA
GREENE & WATTS OP*^KA
MEN'S OUTFITTERS AND SHOES
The Home of Hart Schaffner & Marx Clothes
POCKET BILLLARDS - - -
AUBURN
M O N T E I T H
CANDIES
_
*s
.
LUNCH
ALABAMA
1 1
1 i
i
We Repair Shoes
—By the Goodyear Welt Repairing System
We Use Panco Soles, Good Leather, Korry Kromes
Work Guarantded
B. J. JONES, Auburn, Ala.
College Pressing Club
BOB FOSTER
The Old Reliable—Twenty Years' Service
THE PLAINSMAN
HOLLINGSWORTH ®. NORMAN
Opelika Headquarters for Auburn Students
Leading Clothiers
OPELIKA, ALA.
Men's and Boys' Outfitters
FOOTBALL MADE EASY
"Rat" Horton Advances
Wonderful Theory
Since medical science has made
the transfer of monkey glands to
human beings a popular form of
aiding strength and vigor a suggestion
has been made that glands
of various animals be injected into
players in order that the games
will be pepped up, as the lowbrows
say, and also give the weaker teams
a better chance to win. This suggestion
should meet with instant
favor with the various coaches.
The proper glands for guards
and tackles would naturally be bull
glands. So don't be surprised if
some day you see your favorite
tackle paw the ground, throw up
a little dirt, lower his head, and
with a bellow of rage, charge headlong
into the opposing team. The
backs should be given goat glands,
so they could charge swiftly and
strike the line with telling effect.
However one of the backs should
be injected with the gland of JSL
Missouri mule, so his punts and
drop-kicks would soar far into the
azure sky. Also the ends should
be given some of the glands of the
festive kangaroo, so that they could
leap high after the recalcitrant forward
pass. The value of this system
is easily to be seen.
The PLAINSMAN reporter has
interviewed several professors and
other learned scientific men about
this experiment, and they seem to
be universally in favor of such a
step. He also approached Coach
. Driveum of the Yarvard team, but
Mr. Driveum evidently felt indisposed,
as he gave vent to sarcastic
—-laughter and murmured something
about d d fools.
However our reporter was more
successful with some of the learned
men of the country. The following
' are some of the interviews:
Prof. McNutt, D. F., Pecan University:
"This is exactly what I have always
claimed. I felicitate you on
having finally seen the light."
Prof. Bullthrower, B. S., Kiddem
College: •
"This is a delicate subject, and
should be approached in a scientific
manner. The discussion not only
involves the theory of protoplasm,
but also the cosmography of
the nebular hypothesis. The correct
solution will be found by re-
• ferring to my essay on 'Why Cows
Leave Home.'"
Prof. R. E. Action, C. O., New
Zealand College of Chemistry:
"Pray do not ask me to help
make any more barbarous the already
inhuman game of football.
" Besides, I am too busy in research
| work to waste my time on this bruU
al game. I have now perfected a
poisonous gas, a very small particle
of which will kill thousands
of people. The butler will shdw
you out."
When learned men like these
agree, the system is bound to be
. well night perfect. So the game of
football is due to undergo a rad-
• ical change within the next few
years. And the spectators in order
to keep up will probably be giving
three bleats for Halfback Hard-skull,
the human ram.
length by the members of the club.
Mr. Jones, the director of the organization,
explained the plans in
detail, and when a vote was taken,
it was seen to be the desire of the
club to undertake the construction
of sudji a theatre. If realized, this
plan will add greatly to the facilities
for practicing and producing
plays.
After the business was disposed
of a very interesting program was
rendered. Miss Best made a talk
on "Footlights and Furniture," in
which she explained the proper
use of furniture on the stage. "The
Romance of Broadway" was the
subject of a story told by Mr. Bate-man,
who entertained the audience
for several minutes.
Miss Williams then gave "A Resume
of Tweedles," which is one
of Booth Tarkington's latest successful
plays. The program -'osed
with a talk on "The Career ot Miss
Sarah Bernhardt" by Miss Bentley.
Greater interest is being taken in
the work of the Dramatic Club and
new members are being added to
the roll with every meeting. Prospects
for the year are very bright
and it is hoped that practice on a
good play can begin soon.
Good Program Rendered
By Dramatic Club
The Dramatic Club held its
meeting on Monday night, October
22nd, and one of the largest crowds
of the year was out to it. On the
whole, it was one of the most successful
meetings the club has yet
held.
The possibility of building a
small theatre in the attic of the
Main Building was discussed at
Wirt Literary Society
Growing
The Wirt Literary Society held
its regular meeting on Monday
night, October 22nd. It is a pleasing
fact that the Wirt is still growing
into a larger, livelier and more
important organization. This is
manifested in the number of new
members that have been added, in
those who have been pledged, and
in the interest taken by all the
members in the work in hand.
On Monday night, the society
was very fortunate in having Miss
Dobbs to come and speak on the
subject "The Short Story." Miss
Dobbs, who is quite an authority
on the short story, having written
her thesis for her degree on the
short story of the French School,
gave the society some good points
concerning the subject. After her
lecture she rendered a humorous
reading taken from Mark Twain's
"Innocents Abroad." Miss Dobbs'
talk and reading were greatly enjoyed.
Mr. Clyde Brown entertained the
society with jokes, and then Mr.
J. R. Wood talked upon "What the
United States is doing to help herself
and other nations." After the
business was disposed of the so-society
adjourned.
Alumni News
R. M. "Dick" Johnson, a popular
member of the class of '20, is
editing "Powergrams," an employees'
publication of the Alabama
Power Company. It is one of the
foremost and most attractive in
the large field of Corporation Magazines.
Few probably knew •'of
Dick's ability in the journalistic
line, except probably his old playmate,
Francis Stubbs.
H. M. Smith, '22, is also with the
Alabama Power Company, doing
field duty in his reticent way. You
are right in your assumption.-he
is doing excellent work. Smith was
one of the charter members of Tau
Beta Pi.
R. S. Reed, '21, is attending Boston
Teeh. "Tubby" likes Boston;
he was there while serving in the
Navy during the late War period
and something or someone evidently
became attached to him.-perhaps
it was the reverse. "Tubby"
was student instructor in Mathematics
in his Junior and Senior
years, and Editor of a very good
Glomerata.
The Rexall Store
Prescriptions
Patents
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Opelika and Auburn
IN AUBURN TUESDAYS AND FRIDAYS
Real Must Be Engineered
Many of the men whose names are writ large
in. engineering history are design engineers; men
like Westinghouse, Lamme, Stanley, Hodgkin-son,
Tesla, Shallenberger. Their inventions
have the quality of usefulness, of reliability, of
productabUity; which is an involved way, perhaps,
of saying that they have the primary
r e q u i s i t e of all r e a l l y g r e a t i n v e n t i o n s:
Serviceability.
Engineering history abounds in instances of
near-genius that produced no product, and of
great developments that never reached completion;
and most of these instances are explained
„by the lack, somewhere in the system, of that
ability to give real Service.
Service, in a machine or a system, or wherever
you find it, is not there by accident but because
it was incorporated by men who understood
what was required and knew how to provide it.
Much more is required of the designer than
facility in calculation and mastery of theory.
He must have first hand and thorough familiarity
with manufacturing operations and with commercial
and operating conditions. It takes more
than mere ingenuity and inventiveness to design
apparatus that will be really serviceable and
will "stay put." *
The design engineer, in the Westinghouse
plan, is responsible for the performance of the
finished product. He cannot possibly have the
proper understanding of operation unless he operates
and tests, unless he spends time and thought
in investigation and study, not in the laboratory
or drawing room, but right on the operating
job. Here, most of his ideas will develop; and
here he will see and prepare for all the different
things which the product will later have to
encounter. Then when he comes to put his
creations on paper, his calculations will be
necessary and helpful to check the conclusions
which he has reached, and this right use of them
requires training and a high degree of understanding.
This proper balance of the physical
and mathematical conception of things is what
constitutes engineering judgement.
I t should be thoroughly understood that the
primary function of the design engineer is the
conception and the production of new or improved
apparatus, and familiarity with the
practical is essential to the proper discharge of
this duty.
I t is this view of designing that makes this
branch of Westinghouse engineering so important,
so effective, and so productive of real
developments.
Westinghouse
ACHIEVEMENT 6 OPPORTUNITY
THE PLAINSMAN
Shoes
Clothing
C. S. WHITTELSEY, Jr.
THE YOUNG MEN'S STORE OPELIKA, ALABAMA
Gents'
Furnishings
TIGERS GIVE ARMY
MULE GREAT BATTLE
(Continued from Page 1)
highest lights of the game. The
Army's other touchdown resulted
by a well executed triple pass.
A surprising feature was the
large number of people that were
pulling for Auburn and an inspiration
as well. Among the Auburn
boosters were: Spright Dowell,
President of the Institution, Ers-kine
Ramsey, and Senator Bank-head.
There were also many alumni
of recent years, who are now
seeking acquaintance with Dame
Fortune in the East. All were happy
and much thrilled to see the
Tigers in action again.
The trip to the Point was delightful
as well as educational. The
first lap of the journey carried the
party to Washington and Thursday
in the Capitol was a busy day for
everyone, as many historical points
were visited. Zipp Newman, most
noble scribe of the Birmingham
News, joined the party at Washington.
After a snappy workout at the
Georgetown University Field, a
Theatre party added three interesting
hours of Vaudeville for evening's
enjoyment.
Friday morning found the
more, the Party's Pullman,
across the river from Little
New York. After crossing
Hudson and breakfasting '" Gotham,
taking a squint at Broadway,
the team journeyed on to West
Point. Dean Peterson and Feny
Crane, both the team's quarterbacks,
were lost in the rush and
arrived at the field of combat several
hours later. L. E. Bell, a sophomore
at Auburn last year, who is
now a cadet, was the happiest
mortal seen during the trip, the
joy coming from • seeing the old
bunch again.
After the game, the team left the
Academy for Niagara and Buffalo,
where they spent Sunday. A short
trip across the Canadian border
added to the interesting events of
this day, at the close of which the
party began their return trip to
the cheering throngs and welcoming
hearts of fourteen hundred
Tiger lovers in the Village, and to
the tune of Glory! Gloryt dear old
Auburn.
Gil-just
Old
the
GEORGIA FRESHMEN
SWAMP JUNIOR TIGERS
(Continued from Page 1)
Newell ran in several reserves, and
they held the Red Jersied Men till
the final whistle.
While the Auburn Rats fought to
the finish, they lacked the spirit
displayed by the Georgians, and
the line was woefully weak in
blocking and tackling. English and
Pettit showed up best in our front
rank. Of course, Morton was the
big show for Georgia, but he was
ably seconded by Sherlock and
Kain, who each crossed twice, and
by Hollis who did the kicking. On
the line, Wilder at the pivot, Luck-ey
at tackle, and Howard at end
were the shining lights.
Score by quarters:
Georgia 7 7 7 13
Auburn 0 0 0 0
Referee: Whittelsey (Alabama).
Umpire: Trapp (Auburn). Head
Linesman: Samford (Auburn).
Jevying and disbursing of our
9
taxes.
"Today you are suffering here
at Auburn for the lack of physical
equipment, still we were never before
taxed as we are now. The
orgy goes on and we, the people,
are laying the foundation of a
structure, which, in time, may become
so top heavy that a crash is
inevitable. It is your duty to stop
it."
Mr. Ingalls discussed the organization
of a corporation referring
to the term "terrible corporation as
ranted by the demagogue."
"I want to explain to you," continued
the speaker, "just what constitutes
a terrible corporation of
which you hear the demagogues
rant. In these days and times no
one man has enough money of his
own to carry forward a large busi-'
ness or undertaking such as railroads,
steel plants, steamship lines,
etc. In order to make these projects
possible, many people get together
and put their money into a
pool, as it were, and then turn that
pool over to a group of men, it may
be you, or me, and others, to run
that business. Of such concerns
that are organized not all are successful
by any means, and none of
them become the great octopus as
they are called by the demagogues."
The speaker gave some sound
advice to the young men and re-lounted
some of his own personal
experiences when he was a young
man working his way from the bottom
rung of the ladder. He urged
the men who are goinfe '"*" the
trades as employees to be loyal to
their •, employers, diligent and
painstaking in their work.
INGALLS SPEAKS TO
STUDENTS AT CONVOCATION
(Continued from Page 1)
or class for the benefit of another.
"It is said that we are issuing
thirty year bonds to build five year
roads. This, of course, is exaggerated
to some extent, but will illustrate
my point. We are piling up
money in taxes for political disbursement
and not for doing the
things that should be done. In the
other days our schools and colleges
came in for careful, mature and
painstaking consideration in the
TIGERS READY FOR
BATTLE WITH BENNING
(Continued from Page 1)
istered them by the Tigers. Both
teams will put out everything they
Possess in order to get ready for
.he remaining games on their
schedule. In all probability many
new plays will be tried out by both
elevens and the defense on both
sides will have to keep their eyes
open.
It was great joy to the Tiger followers
to know that the Plainsmen
came out of the Army battle with
out any serious injury, and that
the whole team will be in uniform
and ready to respond to the call
of the coaches. The team received
any number of minor bumps and
scratches, but there was not a man
who called out for time in the
game with soldiers, and the entire
squad is in good condition
for the game to-morrw. In all
probability Coach Pitts will start
the same team against Benning
that he did against the Cadets,
with the exception of Ford, who
will be back at his old position at
full, and Harrison will be shifted
to halfback.
Benning will bring their strongest
team over and nothing short of
a victory will satisfy them. They
have a fast, hard fighting team and
the Tigers are expecting a stiff
battle.
ture in the ball, while games and
stunts directed by Miss Georgia
Thomas were enjoyed in the dining
room. Weil Roseneau proved
to be the champion "apple bobber,"
rescuing three apples from
ths bottom of the tub.,
The Grand March was led by
Miss Lysbeth Fullan and Mr, Earl
Barks. While the girls were engaged
in the Grand March, Mr.
Miles and Miss Dobbs acted as
judges of the costumes. Miss Cary
Hotchkiss, attired in a costume
repreenting the early nineteenth
century, and Miss Lulie Gamble in
a famous Hoop-skirt, tied for first
prize. A coin was flipped and the
prize went to Miss Hotchkiss.
There were numerous "clown"
i
costumes, but, as was stated by the
judges, it was the grace and carriage
of the person within the costume
that caused Miss Elizabeth
Collins to win second place. Misses
Bertha Applin and Anita Norman,
both in costumes of orange and
black, tied for third place. Again
the coin was used and the prize
went to Miss Anita Norman.
After the Grand March, fun ensued
when the crowd unmasked.
A delightful course of orange ice
and cake was served.
Those who were responsible for
the success of the masquerade
were: Decoration Committee: Agnes
Ingram, chairman, Lulie Gamble,
Evelyn Waller, Leila Jordan,
Elizabeth Young, and Lutia Porter.
Refreshment Committee: Lysbeth
Fullan, chairman, Mary Hain,
Clara Nale, and Helen Wise. Entertainment
Committee: Dorothy
Duggar, chairman, Olive Gibbons,
Flora Thompson. The chaperones
were: Miss Zoe Dobbs, Mrs. Harris,
and Mr. and Mrs. Miles.
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Auburn Rah, Tigers Rah,
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m | ;•
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A-U-B-Rah, U-R-N-Rah,
AUBURN TIGERS Rah Rah!
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AUBURN - ALABAMA
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Evening, 7:30 "Great Expectations"
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Hallowe'en Masquerade
Very Enjoyable Affair
The lobby of Smith Hall served
as a place of entertainment for
the Co-eds and the "chosen few"
among the boys, when the Woman's
Student Government Association
gave its annual Hallowe'en
masquerade Saturday night.
The large columns were decorated
in the Hallowe'en colors of orange
and black while the doors and
stairway were twined with vines
of ivy and srnilax. Dancing to music
made by the orchestra composed
of Clara Ellen Yarbrough, piano,
Dick Yarbrough, Saxaphone, Mr.
Fontell, violin, was the main fea-
Wilsonian Literary Society
The Wilsonian Literary Society
kept up its record for splendid attendance
at its regular meeting on
Tuesday night. The enrollment
of the society is more than seventy,
and about sixty-five of this
number were present at the last
meeting. The usual interesting
program was rendered.
Mr. Dixon gave a very good
reading, "The House by the Side
of the Road." The manner in
which he read it made it a pleasure
to listen to him. Mr. Taylor then
made a talk on "The Visit of Lloyd
George to America." In this, he
told what the famous premier's
purpose was in coming to America,
and just what he had done since
he had been here.
Mr. W. A. Young, in a very humorous
talk, told what some of the
alumni members of the Wilsonian
Literary Society were doing since
they left college. It was interesting
to know that everyone of them
were holding down positions of
responsibility in various parts of
the South and elsewhere.
Miss Majors then gave a very entertaining
and humorous reading,
.•ind the regular program was concluded.
There being, a few minutes
left the President of the Society,
called on Mr. R. T. Grant, Mr.
G. E. Sewell, and Mr. W. E. Glenn
for impromptu speeches on any
subject that they might choose.
They responded admirably and
made good talks.
For next week the society has a
debate in store. The subject of
this argument will be: "Resolved,
entertaining program is nromised,
that final semester exams should
be abolished." An instructive and
and it will pay anyone to come out
and take it in.
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AUBURN
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